Friday, May 30, 2008

Really, THAT Old?

Okay, so I'm one of these weirdo people who (1) thinks everyone I'm around is the same age I am, and (2) I think I'm still pretty young. When I get around people who really are my age and they're all moaning and groaning about getting older and they have kids graduating high school or college, I can't help but think, man, you really are old. But me, nah. I'm not old. I have two small children. God doesn't give those to people who are old, right?

Well, today I found out, I must be REALLY old.

I was at my Stroller Strides class this morning, doing my best to keep up with the instructor and keeping up with all the other moms. When we stopped at our last station to do some ab work, one of the moms made a comment to Hadyn about her little "jellies" shoes. She started to reminisce about her childhood "jelly" shoe collection and then other moms joined in. I was laying on my back thinking, "I just don't remember having any jellies when I was little", when one mom said, "yeah, everything from the 80's are coming back."

So, I opened my big mouth. "80's?" I said, "I was in high school in the 80's." Which explained to me why I didn't have any jellies when I was "little". The other moms, just kinda looked at me and then one announced she was born in 1980. Oh well. So, I told of my "thing" of thinking that everyone is the same age. Big mistake.

The conversation then turned to the "encouraging" - 'oh, but age is just a state of mind', and 'you're only as old as you think you are' and of course, the last nail in the coffin, "at least you are out here doing something."

WHAT?!? Um, okay. I guess I should be glad I'm "out here doing something" as opposed to sitting at home in my lazy boy recliner watching soap operas at my ripe old age of 40.

Man, did I think 40 was that old when I was in my 20's? Yeah, probably so. Oh well. I better go rest my weary bones before they just break on me. Now, where's my walker?

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Freakin' Wildlife

I grew up in the country - well, to me it was country. It was in the middle of the Texas Panhandle, very small town, outside the city limits, so, it was country. Anyway, I heard all sorts of animal life around me: dogs, cats, birds, horses, cows, pigs, chickens, coyotes, etc. I appreciate the wild - and not so wild -life. However, it's starting to bug me.

Every morning around 6AM, we are awakened not by an alarm clock, children, or even a city rooster, but by a lonely Cardinal that has claimed our cul-de-sac area as home. He gets in our backyard and calls out for a mate. Man, I'm really thinking of trying to buy a lady Cardinal somewhere and putting her back there just to shush him up! Where can I buy one? I don't know, maybe he has a mate somewhere and he's just proclaiming that fact out loud every morning. I think we know some guys like him.

Then there's the freakin' little bunnies. I really like bunny rabbits. They are so cute with their little bitty ears standing up and their little bitty cotton puff tails. Oh, yeah, they are cute. But doggonnit, they are eating my new flowers I just planted. I saw on the internet that you could put mothballs around the flower garden and the bunnies will stay away. Well, I try just about anything right now. My flower bed looks now like a hail storm hit it (moth balls and eaten up flowers). Now, if I can keep MY wildlife (kids) out of the marshmallow looking mothballs and deter the cute little bunnies elsewhere, I guess I'll be doing good.

I don't guess I'll have to worry about moths by the door for a while, either.

Freakin' wildlife.

Monday, May 19, 2008

That Baby

I went to Hunter's school this afternoon to help with a class project. Scott had told me to bring Hunter home with me - rather than him ride the bus later - when I was done and he would take him to see "Speed Racer", which Hunter has been very anxious to see. We finished up the project around 2:40 so I checked him out of school and we left for home. I let him call Dad to tell him we were on our way and to let Daddy tell him about going to the movie.

Scott and I had already decided that it would be too long a movie to take Hadyn with us, so I told Hunter that it would just be Daddy and him going to the movie and I would stay home with Lil' Bit. Hunter was okay with that - he just wanted to go - but he sat quietly for a second and then said, "we used to go places all the time as a family, now we have 'that baby' and it's always just me and Daddy going." I laughed and agreed with him. Yeah, since we got "that baby", we don't always go and do as a family like we had gotten accustomed to doing. I did tell him that it wouldn't be too much longer before she would be old enough and more importantly, well behaved enough to go to the movies and other things like that and then we'd all go as a family again.

Hunter and I laughed together as we talked about "that baby" and what a feisty, ornery, hurricane of a little stinker she is, but wow! do we love her or what?! We couldn't imagine being without her. She is sweet and precious, smart and lively, happy and healthy, big and beautiful! Her big brother loves her so much and she adores him. She may be "that baby", but he's glad she's OUR baby!!!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Mother's Day

It is Mother's Day, 2008. I got some good cuddles this morning from Hunter and then Hadyn woke up so happy and smiley and saying "Mommyyyyy" (she puts the accent on the last syllable - so cute). Yeah, a great start to a wonderful day. But it's the next thing that just made my morning.

I went to the home school book fair on Friday and picked up Hunter's 2nd grade curriculum for next year. One of the books included in this set was a NIrV Bible. I was showing Hunter how to look up scripture in his Bible and he has been reading in it all morning. He said his teacher at church will give him an extra "bible buck" (given to kids for memorizing their verses to spend at the "store") for bringing a bible to class. He sat on the couch just holding his new bible very close to his chest and told me about hearing on the news of a house fire that burned the family bibles. It made him sad to hear that and as he clutched his bible, he told me how much he loved his bible and how he hopes nothing bad ever happens to it.

It just brought tears to this Mommy's eyes. I know we have many more years and more trials ahead of us, but to hear my 6 - almost 7 -year old son express his love for his bible, just warmed me so much.

And not to leave little sister out, she loves her books, one of which is a board book picture bible which we read daily at her insistence -which she now refers to as her "bi-bo".

Thank you, Jesus, for giving me these precious babies to raise for you.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Dross

For most of us, looking back at ourselves in the past probably isn't an entirely pretty picture. If anyone says they were just perfect or behaved just right, then I hope your doctor continues to renew your "fantasy land" prescription, because reality isn't for you. I can say this with impunity because apparently, I've been living a tad in this fantasy land myself.

Now, I most certainly do not think of myself as perfect. I'm nowhere near it and have never tried to achieve it. My mistakes have come in expressing my opinions, mostly when they were not asked for. See, I like to read things and research things that interest me or that I'm just curious about. So, when a topic comes up that I've seen or read about and I hear incorrect or differing information, I have expressed myself in probably not so nice ways. As I look back on some things said or done, I am truly embarrassed and would like to move on, but alas, only Jesus will wash away your sins and forget about them. Friends and family, do not.

In the past couple of days, I was given a reminder about "back then" and it really hurt. I mean, I'm glad that I have hopefully matured in my Christian walk and have gotten past a lot of my "opinion expressing" but it really stings to have things brought back up. I took a "Breaking Free" (Beth Moore) class at a church not too long ago in which we discussed God's refining process of us. One of the things that has stuck with me is the "surfacing of the dross". Dross is all the impurities in the precious metals in the smelting pot. As the metal (gold, silver, etc.) is heated - put to the fire - TRIALS - the impurities will surface, you can see them and do away with them - or rather, ask God to do it. EVERY day is a trial of life and like I said, just having a reminder stung. It stung because I thought "back then" I was doing nothing malicious, anything I did was out of love for my friends and family, and I had the best intentions for all. To hear that someone had problems with me more or less shocked me. But it also made me realize that some of that "dross" must've been overlooked due to pride. You know the, "what? I don't have the problem, you must have it!" type of pride. Ouch.

Scott has told me not to worry about it, but he knows where I'm at, where I've come from, and what's in my heart. But I want to be refined so that others can just see it too, without me having to tell them. So, again, I've had a letting go of pride trial. Man, it is never ending, is it? But this is a fire I am glad to walk through...I am not alone here. Praise God!